[Finnster]

So do the children have lower IQs bc they are spanked, or are they spanked bc they (and their parents) have low IQs? ;)

Spanking or "smack on the bom" is the last option we use when all else fails. I've only ever truly spanked by 4yo once, last week actually. (and he was really misbehaving)

Overall we use more psycological methods such as timeouts, loss of privledges, early bedtime, loss of treats after dinner, loss of toys/books for the night, etc. as well as positive things such as games, challenges and rewards for accomlpishment. Its like constant psychological warfare lol.

Sometimes he needs a smack on the bom (rarely, usually threat of it is enough) to refocus his mind when all the other tactics are failing. Sometimes, such as if he's really tired &/or hungry, logic gets useless w. him and he's too stuck in the moment or emotion of being upset and not listening and the (threat of ) smacking breaks the logjam.

I've noticed he gets into little spells every now and then where the above tactics are less effective and he's more easily upset and not listening. Seems like he's going thru a growth spurt or something and just seems to be running on hormones and emotions. Goes on for a few days, then some climax of bad behavior, stronger punishment, then a big cry, then he's over it all and good as gold for a long time. Wierd (this was the case w/ the recent spanking too.)

Overall he's a really good kid and tries v hard to be good and is most of the time. IDK too many parents that just beat the S out of their kid alot, but I knew a few growing up. The F'ups I knew usually had parents who where quick to hit and slower to think.