engineering scholarship essay. what do you think?

[JERRY2KONE]

Originally Posted by t-maxxracer32

damn jerry didnt realize that was a rewrite just thought it was a copy and paste of mine for some reason

just finished reading it and and its heck of alot better. much more professional.

thanks alot man i really do appreciate it.

so it seems all i need is a closing statement..?

All I did was copy and paste your writeup into a Word Doc, and then reoganize your work a little bit. I removed and/or changed a few words around just to clean it up some and bring it into a more adult view. Then I broke it up into a few paragraphs to make it read like a book. Lastly I copied and pasted the word doc into that last post.

99% of it is your wording. My best advice to you is that you need to spend more time reading so your eyes and brain get more familiar with how things are supposed to look. The younger generation has spent way too much time playing video games and texting in short hand on their cell phones instead of learning how to read & wirte properly. Believe me I am no pro either, but we all have to do our part to learn the English language if we expect incoming aliens to do it. Our writing skills are becoming much too watered down with all of the crap that is being allowed in our high schools. You asked for advice so there you have it. When allot of us were kids trying to get into college you would have never gotten in without having writing skills. I tell my kids now that it should be our goal every day when we wake up to work on becoming better people while we are on this Earth. I am sure that you have heard the saying that "Knowledge is Power". It all starts with properly understanding the English language. The more knowledge you have the more powerful you will become.